We Walk Together

The other morning, my friend Rita sent me an op-ed from The New York Times. It was authored by Pope Francis, and the title was “There Is Faith in Humor.”

I love Pope Francis, and reading his piece was the perfect way to start my day. His words reminded me of the importance of laughter—especially laughing at oneself. The Pope wrote that even he jokes around. I mean, c’mon! If that isn’t a reminder to lighten up, I don’t know what is.

A few days later, my friend Sandy sent me Paul Krugman’s last-ever column for the Times. It was titled “Finding Hope in an Age of Resentment.”

"Optimism is a Maria subject. Go at it,” Sandy said. I loved that assignment from my dear friend.

If the theme of last week’s essay was love, then I want the theme for this week to be optimism and joy. Yes, I want to leave you with optimism and joy for the new year that’s just around the corner.

I am optimistic about what lies ahead for us. Optimism keeps me looking forward and also brings me hope. It’s a value I’ve noticed that many of those I admire have in spades. Regardless of what’s happened in their lives, they look at the world with optimism.

I know that millions are suffering this holiday season. I see it, I feel it, and I hear about it in conversations. I hear about it in those deep, intimate conversations you have in hushed tones.

Maybe you are one of those people who’s hardly feeling optimistic this holiday season. Maybe the holidays bring up all kinds of emotions for you that make it difficult to enjoy the season. I get it. Maybe this is your first holiday without someone you love by your side. I feel for you. Maybe you find yourself heartbroken or grieving. I’ve been here—it’s rough.

Maybe finances are so tight that you couldn’t get anyone a gift, or maybe you fear no one will remember you. That, in itself, is heartbreaking. I’m sorry. Maybe the political situation still has you reeling, and its impact on your family and friends makes you feel like you are a stranger in a once-known land. I feel you. That’s precisely why leaders like the pope are so important. No matter how hard things are, and no matter how bad things are, the pope has seen it all. What’s inspiring to me is that he keeps rising and trying to help us rise above as well.

I love individuals who help us rise above. I love those who appeal to our hearts instead of just to a specific religion or political party. These individuals speak to our humanity. They touch us where we need to be inspired. They set an example that we can emulate. They offer us hope.

I don’t agree with everything the pope says or does, but he sets an example for me of faith, perseverance, and hope. He has a global outlook that includes all of humanity. He is joyful, not naive. He is faithful and fun.

As I look forward to 2025, keeping the faith and having fun sound good to me. Remaining optimistic also sounds good. It gives me hope, and we all need to be hopeful. I’m hopeful the groundbreaking work that we did with the Women’s Health and Research Initiative will carry on next year. I’m hopeful that the two-party system will continue to work. I’m hopeful that our country will grow more compassionate. I’m hopeful that more people will connect with others to help stem the loneliness epidemic. I’m hopeful that we will find a cure for Alzheimer’s. The list goes on.

Hope is a critical value as we head into the new year. It’s hard to think about a new year without hope. It’s hard to look ahead to another 365 days if you aren’t excited by the idea of them.

So, for a moment, imagine yourself as an integral part of someone else's life. Think about the joy you have brought them. Think about something kind you have done for them. Think about a time you helped them “just because.” Think about a time you shared a deep conversation, a deep understanding, or a deep laugh with them. This kind of connection is what life offers to us, and it’s what we offer to others.

I think so many people feel that the world is so big and so vast that they don’t matter. It can sometimes be scary when we think of how small we truly are. But on the flip side of that, one person can change how we look at the world, how we walk in the world, how we feel about ourselves, and how we feel about our lives.

The other day, a very kind woman named Norma came up to me to tell me a story.

“Several years ago, my daughter was going off to college,” she said. “We had always been best friends, but in that time before she was getting ready to go, we weren’t getting along. We were hardly talking at all. I heard you talk about your book, And One More Thing Before You Go... about kids leaving home, and so I bought it, read it, and quietly tucked it into my daughter’s luggage without telling her. When she got to college, she called me and said, 'Mom, I got the book. I read it. Let’s talk,' and from then on, all was well. It was back to where we had been."

Norma moved me with her story. I got goosebumps as she spoke. I share it now with you because if we move one person closer to another, then that’s a huge success. That’s what it means to change the world one person at a time. Norma shared a story with me, and it moved me. It encouraged me to keep writing and to keep going.

Before I leave for the holidays, I want to say to you: Your voice can impact another person's life. This is the truth. You can impact someone with something you write, something you say, or an act you do.

You never know what it’s going to be, which is why it’s so important to do what you love and stay at it. Chances are that if you are doing what you love, then your joy, passion, and purpose will light up another person's life.

You know, each of us gets to decide what success looks like for us and more importantly, what it feels like. For me, it feels like Norma sharing that story in the early morning, standing by a coffee counter. It feels like raising kids who are good and kind and loving. It feels like having a content heart after so many years of feeling restless and discontent. It feels like my granddaughter holding my hands and looking me in the eyes.

You, my friends, get to fill in the blanks of what a meaningful life looks like and feels like for you. Do not let society or the media dictate what success is and isn’t to you. They present us with a false god and a false paradigm.

Maybe for you, success means giving birth to a healthy child after years of trying. It may be caring for an elderly parent. It may be teaching a class, inspiring kids or those who have gone back to school to learn something new. It may be successfully leaving a situation that no longer serves you—that takes great courage. It may be putting food on the table or buying your own home. It may be looking in the mirror and valuing the face looking back at you.

As this year fades away, do not let your dreams fade away with it. My friend Martha Beck says, "The smaller our steps, the more likely it is we’ll realize our dreams. Today, take one mouse step in the direction of your eagle vision. Tomorrow, take one more.” I love that because it’s something each of us can do. My steps may be different than yours. And my answers will change over time. As I age, some visions will become reality. With others, I’ll have to pivot, change, dream anew.

In my upcoming book, I Am Maria, I talk about the dreams I had as a teenager. I talk about the dreams I had as a young woman in my 20s and as a mother. I write about the dreams I had for the family that I was creating, and how when I got divorced, I had to dream again. Dreams can evolve and change, but I believe it’s important to always have something—something that leads you to your own open field. Something that keeps you focused on your star, something that makes you feel as though you are using your most precious asset, which is time, wisely and for good.

And so, as I stand on the precipice of a new year, I want you to know that your life and your voice matters. How you walk in the world, and the exchanges you have with others, all add up. You being here matters. It matters so much.

Every week, The Sunday Paper reaches the hearts and minds of millions of people all around the world. This publication is in service to you. Everyone who writes, talks, shares every week—they do it to make our world better. Mel Robbins is in her zone helping others, so is Tara Mohr, Rabbi Yoshi Zweiback, and Michelle Hord. Michelle’s story brings me to my knees. She lost a daughter, and she says she can still hold joy. Now to me, that’s inspiring. To me, that brings me hope. That makes me believe in the human spirit.

So yes, I’m optimistic about 2025. I’m excited to meet more people like I always am. I’m excited about my new book and sharing my poems with you (although, I must admit that I’m also a little nervous too, but that’s okay). I’m excited my son Patrick is getting married to the love of his life. For sure, I’ll sob like a baby, but they will be happy tears. They will mark yet another passage of life. And, guess what? I’m also so excited to be launching a brand-new magazine called Meaningful Living in the first week of this new year!

I’ve always wanted a magazine that was an extension of this weekly newsletter. Now we have one! We are all so proud of it. The content is amazing, and it will look beautiful on your coffee table. Manifestations do come true. Trust me!

Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukkah, and happy holidays to all of you. Let’s go into a new year together committed to a more caring, loving, kind, compassionate world one we can build together.