What Happens If Your Candidate Doesn’t Win: Author Allison Carmen on How We Can All Move Forward

I know this might be the article you don't want to read with the election days away, but it's essential all the same. What's fascinating is that whether you talk to people voting for Kamala Harris or Donald Trump, both sides often feel that if their candidate doesn't win, it's the end of the world—they'll have to move, democracy will crumble, and life as they know it will be over. You might be shouting at the page, insisting that your fears are real, and you know the absolute truth of what is to come, but the point here is to help you prepare in case things don't go your way.

I want to offer a cushion to land on—reminders of the principles of uncertainty and the Maybe mindset, a hopeful outlook that's flexible rather than fixed that I've developed and live by over the years. 

Let's start with these six ideas to ground you in uncertain times:

1.     Life is inherently uncertain.  Always. 

2.    No one can predict the future with absolute certainty. Our minds often fill in the gaps of the unknown with worst-case scenarios, but these fears are just possibilities, not certainties.

3.    If we accept that we don't know exactly what will happen, we realize our fears can't be absolute truths. In other words, we can't say with absolute certainty our worst fears will come true.

4.    Because we don't know the future, many outcomes remain possible. Alongside the fears live countless other possibilities. 

5.    Change can only happen in the unknown future. Whether it's in our lives, our communities, or the world, meaningful change depends on the unknown. The very fact that the future is unwritten leaves room for new ideas, fresh policies, and emerging voices.

6.    Uncertainty is an ally for growth and transformation. No matter the election result, uncertainty keeps the door open for future adjustments and improvements. If you're unhappy with the outcome, you can rely on the same uncertainty that the world will keep evolving, new paths will form, and the world will change again.

To embrace uncertainty, I often explore what I call the Maybe mindset, which is a hopeful outlook that's flexible. If your candidate loses, you may initially think about the "Maybe not," imagining only tough times ahead. But if you stay open, there's another side of Maybe: the potential we haven't foreseen, the chance for collaboration, and even the growth that could come out of this moment. Maybe things could still get better. Maybe we'll find a way to address the issues we care about and grow through the process. 

Some of you might still be yelling while reading this article, but again, my purpose is not to downplay the importance of voting or the real impact these election results will have on our future. But whatever happens, we’ll all have to wake up the next day and carry on. And on that road ahead, our perspective will make all the difference.

Of course, we’ll feel strongly about the outcome, but holding onto despair only traps us in a need for certainty—a tempting place to be because it makes us feel justified in giving up and complaining when things don’t go as we hoped. But if we want meaningful change in the world or our lives and want to do it without the weight of constant stress or despair, we need to lean into the unknown and believe in its unlimited potential and possibilities. Embracing uncertainty gives us a path to keep going when things aren’t perfect, to hold onto our purpose, and to keep doing the work we know matters.

Resilience means staying open, even when it feels like the world is against us. And because none of us knows what’s next, Maybe things will change, Maybe they’ll improve, or Maybe—just maybe—the best is still to come.

Allison Carmen is the author of several books, including The Gift of Maybe. She is also a podcaster, TEDx speaker, business consultant, and business and life strategist. Her most recent book is the audiobook Maybe Everything is Okay: A Parent's Guide to Less Stress and Worry. You can watch her 2024 TedxTalk here and learn more at allisoncarmen.com.