Who

Chelsea Handler is a writer, comedian, producer, TV host, activist, and the author of six consecutive New York Times bestsellers. She is the host of her beloved advice podcast, Dear Chelsea and her fourth stand-up special will be released by Netflix in March.

What

In hilarious and tender essays, Handler shares her unforgettable story of becoming the woman she always wanted to be. Surprisingly vulnerable and always outrageous, Handler captures the antic-filled, exhilarating, and joyful life she’s built—a life that makes the rest of us think, I’ll have what she’s having.

Why

Chelsea says, “You are never unrecoverable. You could be a hot mess and you can wake up the next day and be like, Okay, we’re going to take one step today to get me out of this hot mess.”

& We

…chose I’ll have What She’s Having as our Get Lit pick because it is a deeply vulnerable, deeply honest look at the journey of choosing happiness, creating family, being a good sister, and becoming the person you always wanted to be. Enjoy!

Here’s Your Exclusive Excerpt

Little Girl

When I was a little girl, I spent large parts of my day dreaming about the kind of woman I’d one day be. I wanted to fast-forward through all of my youth and misery, and become the more glamorous, successful, adult version of myself.

She would be nothing less than fierce, this woman I’d become. She would never have to worry about fitting in—she wouldn’t be the type of person who valued herself based on other people’s opinions. She wasn’t going to be someone who followed what others did; she would be a leader. She’d be someone who would never have to rely on another person for anything.

She would be confident and never hesitate to stick her neck out for other people. Anyone who needed a hand would be able to depend on her. She’d be strong and she’d be beautiful, with a mind so sharp no one could ever call her just a pretty face. She’d be so much more than that.

She’d be able to light up a room, and her light would spread, making others feel brighter, better. She would be passionate and fiery, and courageous. She’d never be afraid to tell the truth, no matter the consequences.

She’ll be different, this woman. She’ll set an example for all other women. She’ll soar through the world, traveling the globe, leaving her mark everywhere she went.

She’ll break some hearts and heal others. She’ll have men at her feet, begging to be with her, and women at her feet, begging to be her friend. She’ll cast a wide net, and have friends all around the world. She’ll have different loves throughout her life—and then, maybe one true soul mate, an everlasting love. Or maybe not. She’ll be a beautiful hurricane.

She’ll be respected for many reasons. She’ll love people passionately and save people’s lives with her generosity. She’ll be educated about global politics, read every book she can get her hands on, and speak multiple languages. She’ll have certainty in her own opinion and the power to change others’. She’ll have the courage of her own convictions and the boldness to know she is capable of whatever lies at the heart of her dreams. She will be the baddest. The best kind of bad. A matriarch.

This woman I’ll become, she will never be silent.

She’ll be brave, and strong, and able to get out of any bad situation. She will have the kind of bravery it takes to walk into a situation knowing that the worst could happen, and she’ll jump in anyway. The type of bravery it takes to walk away from something or someone you love, knowing that you are walking away not in weakness but in strength. Knowing that you will survive, because you are a survivor. She’ll be a survivor.

Why do I have to wait so long to get to be this woman? I’d wonder.

Childhood has been such a waste of my time.

Woman

When I look back at all the things you’ve been through— from your hard lemonade stand, to driving across country alone at nineteen, to sitting across the table from Woody Allen—I am reminded that you are a force.

You are a rebel, a loudmouth, someone who was never going to settle for the status quo. Someone who knows there is always more, and that you can keep getting better, and that what you’ve always been searching for was a limitless freedom TO BE.

You have lost your way many times, but with fierce determination you have always found your way back to yourself. You are passionate and indefatigable in your desire to grow, learn, and care for others. You have stood up when others have sat down or looked away. You have picked people up off the floor and stood by them when no one else wanted to. You have sat with people and their grief for days, months, years. You go to people when they are at their lowest, and you give them hope.

The biggest gift you have given to others is to be there, to listen, and to hold people in their darkest moments. Remember when you sat beside your friend for a year when she needed you the most? You did that, and then you walked away when it was over. You have shown up; you have made an impact in people’s lives.

You didn’t know that was who you were going to be, but you became that for many people—many of whom you will never even meet. You are a healer. You wanted fame and fortune, and you got that, but all of that was an avenue to help heal. You heal people, and you healed yourself. You are valuable, and you are dependable. You’re always on time. You never leave people waiting, and you are generous—not only with your time, but with your love. You are kind. You care so much about people; about women, about children, about doing the right thing.

You are going to keep loving out, to be more loved, and to sparkle when the sun is not shining. You have seen and done so much, and you’re not even fifty! That’s right, sister. You’re only a year away from turning fifty years old! Can you believe you’re still alive at fifty? It’s not as old as it used to be. You look better than ever, and you finally have the body you’ve always wanted. You’re beautiful. And you can ski like a fucking champ. You even have that ski house you always wanted.

You never went to college, but you’ve sent about fifty other people to college. How cool is that? You have one dog. Sometimes, you have two. You don’t speak any languages other than limited Spanish, even though you’ve been taking Spanish class for years. You’ll get it, one day. I now know you. You’ll get it done. You have friends around the world who would show up for you at the drop of a hat, and YOU HAVE LIVED. You are vibrant, you are alive, and you are LIVING. YOUR LIFE HAS BEEN A DREAM.

You are a learner and a reader. You are so smart, even I am sometimes shocked by all that you know. Remember all the times you thought you were stupid? You have written six New York Times bestsellers. What stupid person does that?

Your family is a gift, and you are a gift to each of them. You show up. Forget about the mistakes, of which there were many. You aren’t your mistakes. You’re not going to repeat those mistakes anymore—and if you slip up, you will make it right. You are a full circle. I’m so proud of you.

You have been loved fiercely, you have broken hearts, and you have been broken yourself. Your heart has broken, your body has broken down, and your mind has, at times, led you astray. Those were all signals to slow down and reassess. Today you are a success. You stood on the shoulders of giants and helped break open even more doors for women. You have misbehaved, and then corrected, and then misbehaved again, and then corrected some more.

Now it’s your job to keep that candle lit, and not to let anyone, including yourself, blow it out. You are effulgent. You are true. You are a bright beam of generosity. Don’t stop what you’re doing, because you are on your way to great things. Hold on to the light. Look in the mirror every day and tell yourself, Hello, beautiful, what great things are we going to get up to today?

From the book I’LL HAVE WHAT SHE’S HAVING by Chelsea Handler. Copyright © 2025 by Chelsea Handler. Published by The Dial Press, an imprint of Random House, a division of Penguin Random House LLC. All rights reserved.

Don’t Miss Chelsea’s Episode of Conversations Above the Noise with Maria!